I just got back from 'running'. I use the term very loosely.
Actually, I warmed up with a brisk walk for 5 minutes, then alternated jogging for 60 seconds and walking for 90 for a total of 20 minutes, then cooling down for 5. So, mostly walking. But it still kicked my butt. And my feet. And all the rest of me. (It's day one of the 'Couch to 5k' program.)
But I am proud of myself. I have lost a total of 16.8 pounds and its amazing how it affects every aspect of my life. The last 2 weeks I feel like I've been kicking butt. Super woman. (for me, that is...) Clean house, laundry done, ironing, nutritious meals for my family, errand-running galore. It makes me feel like I am surfacing. Coming back to myself. Shaving away the excess, revealing my true self that has been buried for far too long.
Remember this, when I wonder why I'm doing this. Because I've lost 16.8 pounds. Because I'm proving myself. Because it gives me the confidence to do other things. Because I have more energy. Because it makes me feel like I am working, like I am conscious, like I am actively making myself better. And smaller. Because people are starting to comment on my changing self. Because it is worth it.