My Day

How is it possible that this was only this morning? Long day. Good day.

(I have no idea where Bella is. Living room?)

Snow day Part 2

I found these delightful little doves cozying up in the snow on my deck. They were so cute and serene, all puffed-up and occasionally cooing. Incidentally, what is the difference between a pigeon and a dove? They look exactly the same, and I have always suspected that they are the same creature with 2 different names, mainly because one connotes disgust and is nicknamed a foraging, flying rat, whereas another is the sign on peace, serenity, beauty. (Not to mention the Holy Ghost- imagine if we learned that the Holy Ghost descended in the form of a- pigeon?)

Bella had Joy School that day, and humorously enough, 2 of the mothers kept their kids home! I wasn't going to pass up an opportunity to leave Bella is someone else's charge, for my sake as well as hers. Miss Molly was nice enough to let them play in the meager snow at her house. Good thing they did so early, because most of the snow had melted by noon.

Umm...the hat I got for Bella when she was an infant. In my defense, it was ridiculously large for a baby, but now that she is nearly 4 it can't be fastened under her chin. I would get her another, but I don't feel an urgency to stock up on snow gear in our North Carolina climate.
I'm just happy that we got our token snowfall, and I'm okay if it doesn't snow again. Unless we got snowed in (ha) and it granted us an excuse, permission for our slovenly indoor ways, to sip hot chocolate and nestle. Since that sounds so far from what I do on a regular basis...Right.

Joy School Halloween Program

As you can clearly see, Bella is the unequivocal star of the show. Hmm.
She's not shy- I don't even think she knows what shy is. I think she's just bored and distracted by that point. If you hear a snapping noise, that's me snapping at her and looking threatening to coerce her out from under the rug.
Her costume/outfit is lovely. It is supposed to be a butterfly, and is pretty cute, but she refused to wear the wings and the antennae. She also refused to take off her pants, which I think offset the look beautifully.
Kids are from left to right (in the first video): Bella, Cai, Sebastian, Ashley, and Naomi. Sebastian is Molly's little boy (the cowboy) and I just really like him in general. His performance only sustained that affection. It's a good thing he was involved or the performance could have been- dare I say-a little lackluster.
3-year olds. Hmph.

Seriously?

So my friend Molly totally bailed me out by agreeing to teach my Joy School lesson today. I called her last night and asked her last minute since the appointment I could get to see the dr. is this morning. Molly offered to watch Bella for as long as I needed today, depending on what happened.
I sheepishly called Linda to see if she would go with me to the ghetto office and be my advocate, and she kindly agreed.
This morning Timm's car wouldn't work. The clutch. So he had to take mine, since it was 5:45 am and he works over half an hour away. He took the car seat out and I am going to ask my friend and neighbor Karilee to take Bella to school this morning. I am going to call Linda and see if she also wouldn't mind giving me a ride downtown to the office. We were going to drive separately in case I had to wait a long time (a common occurrence) or if they sent me over to the hospital. Hmm.
We haven't had milk in a few days and I was going to get some this morning since Bella keeps asking for some.
I am supposed to pick up our food order tomorrow morning.
We only have one working vehicle, which is practically an impossibility due to how far Timm's commute is, the time of day he generally leaves, and the amount of places and jobs he has to get to in a given week. And it appears to be a clutch problem. Clutch = lots of $.
Timm's solution was to demand that I have a C-Section tomorrow morning and he would take the day off of work. Uh huh.
(Throwing up my arms) When it rains, it pours.
We'll see.
f.y.i. If I am as far along as the ultrasound would indicate (and I am-) I could go into labor anytime as well. Another few days and I'd be 38 weeks, when I went into labor with Lola. I don't want to go into labor and then have a C-section again. (Been there, done that.) Not fun.
But when I consider the possibility that I could be having a baby any day, my main concern is the state of my house. I'm worried about my floors that need scrubbing, my bathrooms that need scrubbing. I can' t help but think, "I can't have a baby yet! I haven't cleaned the house!". That, and "But I haven't picked up any new books from the library! I can't be stuck reading 'Feeling Good' about cognitive therapy! I need something good to read!"
Help! I need a clean house and a good book before I can have this baby- Priorities!!

Week in Preview

It seems like I have a lot going on this week- at least it's a lot for me. So in order to document a week's activities, and to try to organize my thoughts and tasks for the week I am going to outline it here so I can refer back to it.
Monday:
I have an NST at 11:00 downtown. I had one on Friday that I missed (oops) so I have to make it up today. Besides that I have to run to the grocery store for a few things and basically clean my house. It's killing me to do a deep-clean of my house because it has been surviving on perfunctory maintenance for so long, but today is not the day. In fact, this week is not the week. Today I have to pick up the whole house, do a minor clean (sweep, mop, vacuum, dust, swish and swipe) especially in preparation for tomorrow. I should throw a couple loads of laundry in there and do my cat care too. (bathe cats, trim nails, clean ears- blech.) I have to do my prep for Joy School tomorrow which includes learning some songs, cutting out a bunch of things, learning the lessons, and setting up.
Tuesday:
Joy School! It's my first turn, and I don't think it's going to be so bad. I've catastrophized it for so long that it couldn't possibly be as 'bad' or stressful as I've been dreading. I'll have to get up early and make sure that Bella and I are bathed and ready, house is cleaned, picked up and ready to receive all the kids. Joy School goes from 9:30-12, after which I hope Bella will take a nap (wishful thinking) so I can too.
Wednesday:
I have to leave the house by 8 to go pick up a food order at the church. I hope it's our last one, but they have helped save our butts over this summer when we were surviving on tiny supplementary part-time job paychecks. It's hard on me because I have to be ready for us to leave the house by 8, which otherwise never happens, but then I have to help unload the truck. It's cool to all work together, and it's the least I can do for free food, but it's physically hard on me. It takes up to about an hour, and it's a lot of bending, pushing, picking up, etc. I usually have cramps during the process, am trying to babysit Bella at the same time, and try not to sweat too much. Although 2 of the last times it has been raining hard, so I had to do it amidst that. After I drop that off at home I need to go to one or two visiting teaching appointments with Molly. Then I have a lot more prep to do for Joy School the next day, including making Gingerbread dough and picking up some books from the library. Thursday's lesson seems a lot more involved so I have a lot more prep to do.
Thursday:
Joy School again. Make sure Bella and I are bathed and ready with the house clean and set up for kids by 9:30. Recover. Make one of Timm's favorite dinners of meatloaf, mashed potatoes and a carrot casserole so he can have it for lunch the next day.
Friday:
Timm's 29th birthday! First though, I have to take Bella downtown with me to go to another NST and Dr's appointment. We have to leave by 7:45am- Yikes! But hopefully we'll be back by 10. I don't know what Timm's work schedule is going to be this week, but I need to plan on having him for dinner that night. I am going to make his boring but other favorite meal of roast with potatoes, carrots, and onions. (Not my favorite, for sure.) I still need to figure out what to make him for dessert and find a time to get a birthday present. I will probably have to do it today, but that also means figuring out what that present should be (I have a couple of ideas) but more importantly, figuring out how to pay for said present.
Saturday:
Birthday party for Bella's friend Ashley at 10:30. Also have to get a present for this party and figure out how to pay for said present. I have to plan my Primary lesson for the next day.
Sunday:
church, which means teaching my crazy 5-6 year old class which usually incapacitates me for the rest of the day. I still have to blog about that.
Sometime in all of that I also have several posts to update about, most pressing being my awesome baby shower I had on Saturday, courtesy of Molly and Linda.I have a rigorous reading habit to keep up with as I am trying to get as much reading done as possible in the next 2 1/2 weeks. My sleeping lately has been horrendous, so I am even more tired than usual. I'm trying to focus on each day by day this week and to remember that I can do hard things, and to keep things and priorities in perspective. Next week (the week before we have a baby!) I hope to muster the energy to finally deep-clean my house. It's all hurdling towards baby Fiona so fast!!! Off to start picking up before I head downtown to the ghetto doctor's office. (another post.)

First Day of (Joy) School

Bella had her first day of preschool today. We decided to join a Joy School that our friend Karilee was organizing. We first met near the beginning of the year to talk about our plans to start this month, so I knew it was coming for a while. I'd never heard of Joy School before I moved to Charlotte, even though it was formed by, you guessed it, Mormons. Basically it's a program that you run yourself with all the participants in your group, following a curriculum that is found online. You join the site, and with the membership you then pay per semester for the curriculum. It is all planned and meticulously organized, you just have to carry it out. Sweet.
It's a good deal because I get to pass her off on someone else on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9:30-12, and I only have to take my turn every 5 weeks since there are 5 of us in the group. From the beginning I knew I would really enjoy 4 out of the 5 weeks, and that when my turn came up it would be hard for me- reasons chiefly being: I don't deal well with stress, chaos, messes and lots of kids, least of all when I am in charge of it and it is taking place in my home. I am constantly aware of the mess, disorder and chaos that is occurring all around me. Oh well, it'll be a good stretching experience. (We hope.)
Bella, all ready to go this morning. We got her a new backpack, or messenger bag. Small bags that can still accommodate normal pieces of paper were hard to come by- at least in Target's selection, which is all I had the energy to try yesterday. Add a new pair of pink Croc-style Mary Janes from Grandma, and she was styled and ready to go. The best part is that I know and trust all the women in our group, and I genuinely like all the kids. Which is saying something. So I wasn't at all nervous about leaving her- my only fears were that she wouldn't cooperate and make it hard for 'Miss Sarah', our lucky first teacher. Bella didn't mind me leaving at all, seemed to have a great time, and gave much protestation when I came to pick her up. It was a lot easier for her since she knew all of the kids and adults involved as well.
The only downer is that my week is next week. Yikes. We shuffled things around so I could have a turn before Fiona makes her arrival and then have a few weeks afterwards to pull it together again. I have been dreading my turn with growing anxiety as the culmination of Joy School drew near, but I think it'll be okay. Like I said, I already know and like the kids, there are only 5 of them including Bella, it's only 2 days, and 2 1/2 hours at a time, every 5 weeks. The curriculum is completely done, all I have to do is the preparation and presentation. And then I have another break for a few weeks. It could be fun. Right?
Nevertheless, I've really been looking forward to it for Bella. She needs the socialization, she needs the time away from me and out of the house, she needs the stimulation, the activities, and to learn the discipline of a 'classroom' environment. It's going to be great for her, and a good learning experience for me if I can take a few deep breaths and maybe a Valium or two when it's my turn. Next Week. Anyone know a doctor who will fax me a prescription before next Tuesday?