I've never been one of those girls who considers Valentine's Day one where I expect to be lavished with gifts and special treatment. I don't think of it as 'my' day, but rather one where I can express my love to all the people in my life, especially my family. Timm and I had agreed that we wouldn't spend any money on each other, but we still spent an enjoyable evening in together. Still, I was surprised when he didn't perform any gesture whatever. No card, no small token purchased with money squirreled away from unknown sources as he is typically wont to do. I really thrive on verbal and written words of appreciation so I may have chastised him a bit for neglecting to do something so simple as to write me a little note for Valentine's Day.
Even as I did so, I remembered something I had heard a few years ago. I can't credit a source, but I remember that it was a General Authority of the Church, and he spoke of romance. He stated that true romance is not found in grand gestures, but in the way we treat our spouse every day. The small, sometimes inconsequential ways that reflect our concern, love and charity for one another are more indicative and often more meaningful than sweeping grand gestures. It was this thinking that prompted this post about a love letter.
This is Timm to a 't'. Every day he treats me kindly. He treats me with the same affection no matter how I act, what kind of mood I am, what I look like, or how I treat him. He is constant, and he is physically affectionate and verbally complimentary every day.
Case in point: Yesterday the girls had dentist appointments and I had no way to get them there. Timm happily took the day off, using a sick day. He hardly ever has a day off so I am sure he was looking forward to sleeping past 5am and relaxing a bit.
But I was sick.
I'm not stricken with polio, or even pnemonia. I just have a bit of a cold. But it makes me feel slightly miserable, and having to take care of children when you are sick is the worst to me. It's not just like you have to go to work sick, you have to take care of others when you feel like you need taking care of. Like you can't even take care of yourself, but you still have to attend to the needs of others. So on his rare, unexpected day off, Timm ran an errand for me, taking Bella with him. Then when he got back he took both girls to the dentist for close to 2 hours so I could stay home. When he got home, he fed them lunch and told me to go to bed. He put them down for naps and quiet time. He got them both up from naps and quiet time. He took over the whole day until I got up to cook dinner, when he finally sat down to do mountains of grading that he had planned on doing that day. After the girls were in bed he went to the grocery store to get me a few things since he has to work late for the next two days. So on his rare day off, he spent the day taking care of the girls so I could laze around and take naps, hoping to make a quick recovery of a silly cold. He did so without complaint, even cheerfully and affectionately.
That's just his way.
He gives me love letters every day.