Thursday, November 27, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
On Record
to Timm: "Dad, you're respectable."
(when I asked her if she just called her dad 'respectable' she quickly told me several times that she was just kidding, obviously thinking that she had said a bad word. Timm promptly told her to tell his mom and dad.)
to Mama: "You're impossible."
(no explanation necessary.)
Timm: "Bella, how'd you get so freakin' cute?"
Bella: " My name's not 'Freakin' Cute' for one thing..."
(at which point she was interupted by my laughter so we never got to hear what the other thing was.)
"Can we just leave Fiona in the car?"
(several times recently.)
Timm: "Damnit."
Bella, calling from the bathroom as she goes potty: " Daaaaad- we don't say damnit!"
Timm: "Okay Bella."
Bella: "You didn't say 'sorry'!"
Timm: "Sorry!"
Bella: "That's Okay!"
(all from the potty.)
The scene: Bella is being the manners police, as she frequently does, to grandpa.
Timm: "Bella, who's in charge of grandpa?"
Bella: "Grandma."
(when I asked her if she just called her dad 'respectable' she quickly told me several times that she was just kidding, obviously thinking that she had said a bad word. Timm promptly told her to tell his mom and dad.)
to Mama: "You're impossible."
(no explanation necessary.)
Timm: "Bella, how'd you get so freakin' cute?"
Bella: " My name's not 'Freakin' Cute' for one thing..."
(at which point she was interupted by my laughter so we never got to hear what the other thing was.)
"Can we just leave Fiona in the car?"
(several times recently.)
Timm: "Damnit."Bella, calling from the bathroom as she goes potty: " Daaaaad- we don't say damnit!"
Timm: "Okay Bella."
Bella: "You didn't say 'sorry'!"
Timm: "Sorry!"
Bella: "That's Okay!"
(all from the potty.)
The scene: Bella is being the manners police, as she frequently does, to grandpa.
Timm: "Bella, who's in charge of grandpa?"
Bella: "Grandma."
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Hallelujah!
9:54 pm- no crying.
'15 Most Infamous Child Star Mugshots' on E. (I'm really bored. There's nothing on.)
Timm just got home from work.
We're setting up the air mattress for a camp out.
Mom, dad, Ryan and Miles will be here in the morning. (Or middle of the night.)
One good night.
(p.s. Fi gave her first smile 5 days ago, yet I could not elicit anything besides this blank, albeit happy, expression.)
'15 Most Infamous Child Star Mugshots' on E. (I'm really bored. There's nothing on.)
Timm just got home from work.
We're setting up the air mattress for a camp out.
Mom, dad, Ryan and Miles will be here in the morning. (Or middle of the night.)
One good night.
(p.s. Fi gave her first smile 5 days ago, yet I could not elicit anything besides this blank, albeit happy, expression.)
Monday, November 24, 2008
Note to Self:
Do not plan to do ANYthing between the hours of 7 and 11 pm. Unless those plans are to endlessly pace the floor, rock, pat, shush, sing, sway, change positions, nurse, practice 'Serenity Now' and becoming zen-inevitably giving in to the roar of white noise that is incessant screaming. No reading, no watching tv (if you want to follow it whatsoever), no cleaning, no talking, nothing productive and nothing enjoyable. After 11 pm. you may ready yourself for bed as quickly as possible, hope Fiona will sleep in the nursery and dive into bed, hoping for a possible 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep.
We're 1 hour in for tonight. 2-3 more to go.
We're 1 hour in for tonight. 2-3 more to go.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Life with Reflux (a mother's perspective).
I've already detailed the horrors of nighttime reflux-induced colic, but here's an account of the rest of the side effects it causes. Sometimes she seems absolutely fine, other times she seems to suffer every textbook side effect of the disease. (Except for poor weight gain- for some reason she's go that down like a champ.)
Reflux babies must be fed on demand- no schedules allowed. That's fine by me since that's how I tend to feed anyway, except that because of the refulx, she needs to eat every 2 hours- sometimes sooner. During the day it is not uncommon for her to need to eat every hour and a half. There are two reasons for this frequent feeding: 1- they cannot or should not consume very much at each feeding. The amount they eat increases the likelihood of and the side effects themselves- namely spitting up and acid. 2- Feeding is a painful experience, and as they are reclined the acid comes up into their throats, burning as they try to eat. Swallowing is painful as well.
Besides being painful, feeding can be an extremely frustrating experience. She starts to feed ravenously and then pulls off either because she is choking, or because it is burning her throat. She pulls off in frustration, cries, realizes how hungry she is, attempts to feed again, repeat ad naseum. Eventually she gets so mad she is frantically searching but refuses to eat. In pain and hungry, we usually abandon that attempt and try again in a little while. Another reason for frequent feeding.
Of course there is the spitting up, but that has been significantly reduced by the Zantac she is on. Of course, she still 'ruins' my shirt several times a day and we can never be without a burp cloth when feeding. She no longer resists the incredibly vile Zantac which is a potent menthol suspended in alcohol. I tried it- it is truly heinous.
Sleeping is also difficult for the reflux baby, as laying down brings the acid up as well. They tend to sleep better on their stomachs, and it is sometimes recommended for severe cases of reflux. We alternate, depending on how she does and how much I need her to sleep. We still eat every 2-3 hours through the night. Sigh. At least she is mostly sleeping in her crib now! I wedge her in between the bumper pads and a boppy, so she feels secure. When she is particularly fussy she sleeps in bed with us, cradled in my arm so we can all get some much-needed sleep.
Another unfortunate side effect is congestion and wheezing. She has been really congested for about 4 or 5 weeks now. Constantly. We are frequently using the nasal aspirator to clear that out as much as possible. This also causing a lot of wheezing and the occasional cough.
Perhaps the worst symptom is gassiness- she is literally constantly gassy. Her stomach is hard and tight as she writhes around seeking relief, alternately pulling her legs p and flailing them about. I am frequently stretching and manipulating her legs, trying to help her. Even when she can pass gas, there seems to be little relief, as thre is always more that we cannot relieve.
So as you can probably tell, there is a lot of discomfort, pain, and frustration for everyone involved. Luckily she is usually at her worst when Bella is already in bed, so Bella doesn't have to stand by and hear the crying for hours, and I don't have to completely neglect her in order to fruitlessly try and soothe Fiona. Last night Fi started losing it right at Bella's bedtime which is a frequent occurrence. Timm was at work, so I had to put Bella down while trying to quiet Fi. The result is me rushing through the story and bedtime routine so I can get out of there and direct my full attention to the screamer. I'm glad that Bella's routine and attention is not any more disrupted than it is.
What I want to know is, why is colic worst at night? What difference does it make? Why do we have some days that go off without a hitch, and still more like alst night? What variables are there? None that I can tell.
I took her to an Ear, Nose and Throat (EMT) on Friday morning to rule out anatomical problems since her choking can be so severe. He scoped her and found nothing wrong there (her throat), but ordered us to go to the children's hospital on Monday morning to take some fils of her to chest. We need to rule out that there could be an anatomical problem causing her to aspirate into her lungs. Once that is clear, and I'm sure it will be, I will be referred to a pediatric Gastroenterologist (GI) who will diagnose reflux based on all of her symptoms. The only treatment we can really change is this case is to prescribe her a more proactive Prilosec instead of the mild Zantac. Colic sometimes improves at 3 or 4 months, but the cause and effects of reflux itself doesn't totally dissipate until their first year.
Oh deem, oh dee.
It's a good thing that I am experiencing this now because I have a better perspective after having Belle. I know that this time really is fleeting, just a stage, and i can only do my best. I am significantly calmer than I ever would have imagined, mostly because I have decided to be. She will scream no matter what, so I decide to be calm and collected. Why add to the misery by getting upset? I've yet to come to tears through through it all. We'll just keep on truckin'.
Incidentally I feel deliriously tired and keep nodding off while I am typing, resulting in almost intelligible writing. My fingers are not finding the proper keys or putting them in the right ordure of that matter so i better try and rest. Ha!
*edited to add* It is several hours later and I reread this post since I couldn't quite remember writing the whole thing, due to falling asleep during the process. I laughed my way through it, counting 16 blatant typos and leaving them all in place as evidence of my state of mind. You may find more...
Reflux babies must be fed on demand- no schedules allowed. That's fine by me since that's how I tend to feed anyway, except that because of the refulx, she needs to eat every 2 hours- sometimes sooner. During the day it is not uncommon for her to need to eat every hour and a half. There are two reasons for this frequent feeding: 1- they cannot or should not consume very much at each feeding. The amount they eat increases the likelihood of and the side effects themselves- namely spitting up and acid. 2- Feeding is a painful experience, and as they are reclined the acid comes up into their throats, burning as they try to eat. Swallowing is painful as well.
Besides being painful, feeding can be an extremely frustrating experience. She starts to feed ravenously and then pulls off either because she is choking, or because it is burning her throat. She pulls off in frustration, cries, realizes how hungry she is, attempts to feed again, repeat ad naseum. Eventually she gets so mad she is frantically searching but refuses to eat. In pain and hungry, we usually abandon that attempt and try again in a little while. Another reason for frequent feeding.
Of course there is the spitting up, but that has been significantly reduced by the Zantac she is on. Of course, she still 'ruins' my shirt several times a day and we can never be without a burp cloth when feeding. She no longer resists the incredibly vile Zantac which is a potent menthol suspended in alcohol. I tried it- it is truly heinous.Sleeping is also difficult for the reflux baby, as laying down brings the acid up as well. They tend to sleep better on their stomachs, and it is sometimes recommended for severe cases of reflux. We alternate, depending on how she does and how much I need her to sleep. We still eat every 2-3 hours through the night. Sigh. At least she is mostly sleeping in her crib now! I wedge her in between the bumper pads and a boppy, so she feels secure. When she is particularly fussy she sleeps in bed with us, cradled in my arm so we can all get some much-needed sleep.
Another unfortunate side effect is congestion and wheezing. She has been really congested for about 4 or 5 weeks now. Constantly. We are frequently using the nasal aspirator to clear that out as much as possible. This also causing a lot of wheezing and the occasional cough.
Perhaps the worst symptom is gassiness- she is literally constantly gassy. Her stomach is hard and tight as she writhes around seeking relief, alternately pulling her legs p and flailing them about. I am frequently stretching and manipulating her legs, trying to help her. Even when she can pass gas, there seems to be little relief, as thre is always more that we cannot relieve.
So as you can probably tell, there is a lot of discomfort, pain, and frustration for everyone involved. Luckily she is usually at her worst when Bella is already in bed, so Bella doesn't have to stand by and hear the crying for hours, and I don't have to completely neglect her in order to fruitlessly try and soothe Fiona. Last night Fi started losing it right at Bella's bedtime which is a frequent occurrence. Timm was at work, so I had to put Bella down while trying to quiet Fi. The result is me rushing through the story and bedtime routine so I can get out of there and direct my full attention to the screamer. I'm glad that Bella's routine and attention is not any more disrupted than it is.What I want to know is, why is colic worst at night? What difference does it make? Why do we have some days that go off without a hitch, and still more like alst night? What variables are there? None that I can tell.
I took her to an Ear, Nose and Throat (EMT) on Friday morning to rule out anatomical problems since her choking can be so severe. He scoped her and found nothing wrong there (her throat), but ordered us to go to the children's hospital on Monday morning to take some fils of her to chest. We need to rule out that there could be an anatomical problem causing her to aspirate into her lungs. Once that is clear, and I'm sure it will be, I will be referred to a pediatric Gastroenterologist (GI) who will diagnose reflux based on all of her symptoms. The only treatment we can really change is this case is to prescribe her a more proactive Prilosec instead of the mild Zantac. Colic sometimes improves at 3 or 4 months, but the cause and effects of reflux itself doesn't totally dissipate until their first year.
Oh deem, oh dee.
It's a good thing that I am experiencing this now because I have a better perspective after having Belle. I know that this time really is fleeting, just a stage, and i can only do my best. I am significantly calmer than I ever would have imagined, mostly because I have decided to be. She will scream no matter what, so I decide to be calm and collected. Why add to the misery by getting upset? I've yet to come to tears through through it all. We'll just keep on truckin'.
Incidentally I feel deliriously tired and keep nodding off while I am typing, resulting in almost intelligible writing. My fingers are not finding the proper keys or putting them in the right ordure of that matter so i better try and rest. Ha!
*edited to add* It is several hours later and I reread this post since I couldn't quite remember writing the whole thing, due to falling asleep during the process. I laughed my way through it, counting 16 blatant typos and leaving them all in place as evidence of my state of mind. You may find more...
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Evidence
Just in case anyone thinks I am exaggerating or being dramatic about the issue of 'colic' and reflux around here, I submit this evidence.
If you are prone to migraines or hypertension, do NOT watch this video.
That was 15 seconds of what can amount to 3 hours of screaming and crying. Tonight she stopped about 30 minutes ago after 3 1/2 hours of intermittent crying, where there was more of that than there was of peace.
I tried to make cookies to stuff my frustration and stress, but only got so far. I abandoned it after 10 minutes. The amount of time that she stayed asleep in her crib when I transferred her from my arms. I left it all in the kitchen.
My bed, unmade for the last 2 days.
A project I undertook, organizing and storing my maternity clothes and cleaning out my drawers. A relatively simple project I started yesterday. Silly me.
My stack of books from the library awaiting my attention.
The one I am currently trying to get through in the very few minutes a day I can actually read.
Colic self-portrait.
Trying to deal.
And this is me, in all my glory. Lounge clothes with multiple large spit-up spots. Actually my second spit-up covered cleaning shirt of the day. Yesterday's makeup-smeared mascara and eyeliner. Zits dotting my entire face, no doubt from a combination of stress and a deluge of sugar and other large quantities of junk. My teeth aren't even brushed.
While it's true that the screaming is usually only at night, my days are often darkened by the shadow of the previous night's episode. Last night was another particularly bad 'sode, and today I was tired, lounged, and tried to recoup. Thus, my house in in disrepair, I am in... a sad and sorry physical state, and I miss my husband as more than a sounding board and an occasional relief from the screaming baby. I am actually dealing quite well and am very proud of myself on my emotional fortitude, but I still don't know how much more of this I can take. Right now she is mercifully asleep in her crib, (going on 20 minutes!!) and I am trying to steel myself for-at best, wakings at every 2 hours, and at worst, sleeping with her in my arms. Or maybe it's the other way around. I don't know anymore.
How on earth am I hosting my family's stay for Thanksgiving in 3 days? What the?
Help me. I am dead inside.
(that last part was supposed to convey a dry but humorous declaration of my mental state, but Timm said it read more like 'I am going to go kill myself.' So- it's not suicidal. It's dry humor at the expense of my sanity.)
If you are prone to migraines or hypertension, do NOT watch this video.
That was 15 seconds of what can amount to 3 hours of screaming and crying. Tonight she stopped about 30 minutes ago after 3 1/2 hours of intermittent crying, where there was more of that than there was of peace.
I tried to make cookies to stuff my frustration and stress, but only got so far. I abandoned it after 10 minutes. The amount of time that she stayed asleep in her crib when I transferred her from my arms. I left it all in the kitchen.
My bed, unmade for the last 2 days.
A project I undertook, organizing and storing my maternity clothes and cleaning out my drawers. A relatively simple project I started yesterday. Silly me.
My stack of books from the library awaiting my attention.
The one I am currently trying to get through in the very few minutes a day I can actually read.
Colic self-portrait.
Trying to deal.
And this is me, in all my glory. Lounge clothes with multiple large spit-up spots. Actually my second spit-up covered cleaning shirt of the day. Yesterday's makeup-smeared mascara and eyeliner. Zits dotting my entire face, no doubt from a combination of stress and a deluge of sugar and other large quantities of junk. My teeth aren't even brushed.While it's true that the screaming is usually only at night, my days are often darkened by the shadow of the previous night's episode. Last night was another particularly bad 'sode, and today I was tired, lounged, and tried to recoup. Thus, my house in in disrepair, I am in... a sad and sorry physical state, and I miss my husband as more than a sounding board and an occasional relief from the screaming baby. I am actually dealing quite well and am very proud of myself on my emotional fortitude, but I still don't know how much more of this I can take. Right now she is mercifully asleep in her crib, (going on 20 minutes!!) and I am trying to steel myself for-at best, wakings at every 2 hours, and at worst, sleeping with her in my arms. Or maybe it's the other way around. I don't know anymore.
How on earth am I hosting my family's stay for Thanksgiving in 3 days? What the?
Help me. I am dead inside.
(that last part was supposed to convey a dry but humorous declaration of my mental state, but Timm said it read more like 'I am going to go kill myself.' So- it's not suicidal. It's dry humor at the expense of my sanity.)
Friday, November 21, 2008
Foiled Again!
Blue's Clues has stumped me once again.
We're trying to guess what kind of plant it is.
The clues are: the color red, round circle shapes, and a vine.
My thought process: Hmm... they look like apples, but apples don't grow on vines...Strawberries? No, they're not circular. And they don't grow on vines. Some indistinct berry plant? And before I could continue brainstorming, they concluded that it was in fact (you guessed it-) a tomato plant!
Ah, tomato. But of course.
I swear I'm not retarded.
Technically speaking.
We're trying to guess what kind of plant it is.
The clues are: the color red, round circle shapes, and a vine.
My thought process: Hmm... they look like apples, but apples don't grow on vines...Strawberries? No, they're not circular. And they don't grow on vines. Some indistinct berry plant? And before I could continue brainstorming, they concluded that it was in fact (you guessed it-) a tomato plant!
Ah, tomato. But of course.
I swear I'm not retarded.
Technically speaking.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Resemblance?
Here are 2 pictures of the girls, taken when they were the same age which is a bit over 2 months. Now, at first glance you may say that Bella is prettier, but she has the advantage of great lighting and a photo shoot outfit. (I used her birth announcement picture from this session.)I chose photos that weren't necessarily the best, but were as similar in composition as possible. I am terrible at discerning likeness in anyone, so I'm opening it up for popular vote. What do you see?
Another Look
I was having trouble formatting these with the other 2 so I did a separate post. Also I could not bring the photos any closer together!?*@ Just another look. (And it seems obvious, but just in case- the first photos are of Bella, and the second are little Fi.)
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Wish List
For my own, as well as other's use, I have decided to create a wish list. I will update it as needed and keep it on my sidebar. I don't want for much, but I'll write it down when I think of it and you shall wonder no more.
Incidentally, I think life would be much easier if everyone did this!
Sewing Shears
Sewing Box (for supplies)
Cutting Mat
Fabric!
Wool Felt
The Creative Family by Amanda Blake Soule
Handmade Home by Amanda Blake Soule
Bend the Rules Sewing by Amy Karol
Bend the Rules with Fabric by Amy Karol
Pedicures
Drug Store or Ulta g.c.'s for makeup and toiletries
New stainless steel appliances
New carpet
Exterior home makeover
Gone With the Wind dvd
Target gift cards (for all of life's necessities)
Sewing lessons
Running clothes
Rita's Water Ice gift cards
iTunes gift cards
Slippers
Blurb g.c.'s so I can publish my blog books
Real Simple, Cooking Light, or Weight Watcher's subscriptions
This dust-ruffle for Bella (twin)
iPod- bright pink or green.
Double Jogger
Special Nike iPod running shoes
Crest White Strips
Weight Watchers passes
New glasses
Deep ceramic pie plate
Sunglasses
Marking Pens and Pencils
Incidentally, I think life would be much easier if everyone did this!
Sewing Box (for supplies)
Fabric!
Wool Felt
The Creative Family by Amanda Blake Soule
Bend the Rules Sewing by Amy Karol
Bend the Rules with Fabric by Amy Karol
Pedicures
Drug Store or Ulta g.c.'s for makeup and toiletries
New stainless steel appliances
New carpet
Exterior home makeover
Gone With the Wind dvd
Target gift cards (for all of life's necessities)
Sewing lessons
Running clothes
Rita's Water Ice gift cards
iTunes gift cards
Slippers
Blurb g.c.'s so I can publish my blog books
My 100
1. I love to read- my goal for 2008 was to read 50 books, and I am on #47 -Not bad for having a baby in September!
2. Lavender is my favorite scent.
3. I love naps more than words can tell. Lately I NEED them.
4. I watch too much tv, but I love it.
5. I want to be a runner.
6. Running a marathon is a dream and would make me feel like a superhero!
7. I am a night owl by nature.
8. I wish I could sleep late every day.
9. I am always hot- embarrassingly so. Always.
10. I love Coke Zero.
11. I require a lot of sleep.
12. I hate clutter.
13. I have been on anti-depressants for about 8 years.
14. I have had 3 C-Sections and my tonsils removed.
15. Hannah is my best friend.
16. Erin is my oldest friend-13 years.
17. Molly is the best friend I've made in Charlotte.
18. My grandma Charlotte is my role model and hero.
19. My sister Michelle is also my best friend.
20. So is my husband!
21. I am always trying to improve myself and read many self-help books.
22. I have 2 hairless cats.
23. I have the sickest, grodiest, scratchiest, most calloused and beyond hope feet in the world.
24. I think I have the coolest, most interesting, talented, funny and inspiring family.
25. My look is fashionable, but very casual.
26. I love candy corn.
27. I love peanut butter M & Ms.
28. There is hardly a food that I don't like.
29. I LOVE a clean house!
30. I love pink and green together.
31. I am a chronic, hopeless homebody.
32. I love to write.
33. I love to create and work with my hands.
34. I love my husband's laptop- it helps aid my sedentary lifestyle.
35. I wish I lived in an old, historic house.
36. My first cd was Vanessa Williams, a cast off from Michelle.
37. Har and Peastore were my childhood imaginary friends. They were fairly long-lived, and there was one more, but he was more transient and I forget his name.
38. I have lived in Denver, Pittsburgh (Wexford), Philadelphia (Langhorn and Yardley), Utah (Orem and Provo) and now Charlotte, NC.
39. I have travelled internationally to Chihuahua, Mexico and Paris,
40. I hate the word 'panties'. Ew.
41. Fall is my favorite season, then spring. I hate the summer.
42. I love cold cereal and could eat it for 3 meals a day.
43. I love being married to my husband. (5+ years now.)
44. I keep my nails cut very short so I can easily and aggressively use my hands.
45. When I was about 8 I tried to institute a paying library. I was furious when my parents wouldn't let me have a dedicated phone line.
46. I am pretty uncoordinated.
47. I was lactose intolerant while pregnant with Fi, and now she appears to have a milk intolerance as well.
48. I am 5'3" with very short legs and pants are always, always too long for me.
49. I hate mouth noises-especially smacking!
50. I am the baby of my family.
51. I must have alone time everyday to recharge and restore my sanity.
52. I have many 'associates' but few very close friends
53. I can, and do go outside barefoot in any conditions, including snow.
54. I cannot imagine my life without the internet-it seems I research something every day.
55. I really really wish I could play the piano.
56. Ditto with sewing.
57. I've gotten pregnant twice while on birth control.
58. I have 10 books on hold at the library right now.
59. I have 210 books on my 'to-read' list.
60. Once I got Blue's Clues wrong. Seriously. I thought it was spaghetti and meatballs- it was pizza.
61. I hate, absolutely hate Timm's sneeze. It is so loud, startling, and over the top that I can't even say 'Bless you.' I know that's stupid.
62. I feel very generous with what I have.
63. Acts of service do not come easily to me.
64.I wish I had an old house. An old farmhouse, craftsman, tudor...
65. I love to bake and have learned to make bread this year. I'm loving it.
66. I have always been pale, and I like it except when my pasty legs are shown in a bathing suit. Tan fat looks way better than pale fat. (Just like how black is slimming and white is not-)
67. I am not very good at keeping in touch, even when I am very fond of the person.
68. I almost always feel tired and ready for a nap.
69. I think I tend towards laziness, even though work is always very motivating and rewarding.
70. Twix is my new favorite candy bar.
71. I wish I could wear cozy socks, but I never do because of my constantly over-heated state.
72. I am a good listener and very empathetic.
73. I love any kind of massage, back rubs, or tickles and hardly ever get any of them.
74. I love the smell when the heat comes on.
75. I love words.
76. In my spare time I would almost always rather eat, read, or sleep, preferably in that order.
77. I want to lose 60 pounds.
78. I love real estate and search for houses regularly.
79. If I am curious about something, I immediately research it on the internet until I am satisfied and then I still usually check out one or more books on the subject.
80. I don't know how I ever lived before DVR.
81. I love HGTV.
82.I started a huge quilt more than 10 years ago and it is still unfinished.
83. I would really love to start quilting again, but I need to relearn it.
84. I love to sing (alto) but I am very out of practice.
85. I am pretty good at a lot of things, but not really good at any one thing.
86. If I had unlimited funds, I would tweak my style and streamline my house, making it cleaner and more linear.
87. My grandma's nickname for me is 'Pritzy Pritz.'
88. Timm calls me 'jt'.
89.My grandma's house has always been my safe place and I have memories as early as 3 years old.
90. I swear in my dreams.
91. I am afraid of heights, including ladders.
92. My only other fear is sprouting vegetables- other than those 2 things, I'm fear-free.
93. I am trying to simplify my life, including our consumerism.
94. I used to be a huge spastic animal-rights vegetarian animal-lover.
95. Then I grew up and had kids.
96. My first child was a perfect little girl who was stillborn at full-term. Her name is Lola Jane.
97. I still cannot grasp or believe that I have 3 kids.
98. Right now I have a closet full of cute clothes that aren't even close to fitting me.
99. Right now I am also very insecure about my weight and feel like the 'fat friend.'
100. I'm so glad I'm blogging while my children are small.
2. Lavender is my favorite scent.
3. I love naps more than words can tell. Lately I NEED them.
4. I watch too much tv, but I love it.
5. I want to be a runner.
6. Running a marathon is a dream and would make me feel like a superhero!
7. I am a night owl by nature.
8. I wish I could sleep late every day.
9. I am always hot- embarrassingly so. Always.
10. I love Coke Zero.
11. I require a lot of sleep.
12. I hate clutter.
13. I have been on anti-depressants for about 8 years.
14. I have had 3 C-Sections and my tonsils removed.
15. Hannah is my best friend.
16. Erin is my oldest friend-13 years.
17. Molly is the best friend I've made in Charlotte.
18. My grandma Charlotte is my role model and hero.
19. My sister Michelle is also my best friend.
20. So is my husband!
21. I am always trying to improve myself and read many self-help books.
22. I have 2 hairless cats.
23. I have the sickest, grodiest, scratchiest, most calloused and beyond hope feet in the world.
24. I think I have the coolest, most interesting, talented, funny and inspiring family.
25. My look is fashionable, but very casual.
26. I love candy corn.
27. I love peanut butter M & Ms.
28. There is hardly a food that I don't like.
29. I LOVE a clean house!
30. I love pink and green together.
31. I am a chronic, hopeless homebody.
32. I love to write.
33. I love to create and work with my hands.
34. I love my husband's laptop- it helps aid my sedentary lifestyle.
35. I wish I lived in an old, historic house.
36. My first cd was Vanessa Williams, a cast off from Michelle.
37. Har and Peastore were my childhood imaginary friends. They were fairly long-lived, and there was one more, but he was more transient and I forget his name.
38. I have lived in Denver, Pittsburgh (Wexford), Philadelphia (Langhorn and Yardley), Utah (Orem and Provo) and now Charlotte, NC.
39. I have travelled internationally to Chihuahua, Mexico and Paris,
40. I hate the word 'panties'. Ew.
41. Fall is my favorite season, then spring. I hate the summer.
42. I love cold cereal and could eat it for 3 meals a day.
43. I love being married to my husband. (5+ years now.)
44. I keep my nails cut very short so I can easily and aggressively use my hands.
45. When I was about 8 I tried to institute a paying library. I was furious when my parents wouldn't let me have a dedicated phone line.
46. I am pretty uncoordinated.
47. I was lactose intolerant while pregnant with Fi, and now she appears to have a milk intolerance as well.
48. I am 5'3" with very short legs and pants are always, always too long for me.
49. I hate mouth noises-especially smacking!
50. I am the baby of my family.
51. I must have alone time everyday to recharge and restore my sanity.
52. I have many 'associates' but few very close friends
53. I can, and do go outside barefoot in any conditions, including snow.
54. I cannot imagine my life without the internet-it seems I research something every day.
55. I really really wish I could play the piano.
56. Ditto with sewing.
57. I've gotten pregnant twice while on birth control.
58. I have 10 books on hold at the library right now.
59. I have 210 books on my 'to-read' list.
60. Once I got Blue's Clues wrong. Seriously. I thought it was spaghetti and meatballs- it was pizza.
61. I hate, absolutely hate Timm's sneeze. It is so loud, startling, and over the top that I can't even say 'Bless you.' I know that's stupid.
62. I feel very generous with what I have.
63. Acts of service do not come easily to me.
64.I wish I had an old house. An old farmhouse, craftsman, tudor...
65. I love to bake and have learned to make bread this year. I'm loving it.
66. I have always been pale, and I like it except when my pasty legs are shown in a bathing suit. Tan fat looks way better than pale fat. (Just like how black is slimming and white is not-)
67. I am not very good at keeping in touch, even when I am very fond of the person.
68. I almost always feel tired and ready for a nap.
69. I think I tend towards laziness, even though work is always very motivating and rewarding.
70. Twix is my new favorite candy bar.
71. I wish I could wear cozy socks, but I never do because of my constantly over-heated state.
72. I am a good listener and very empathetic.
73. I love any kind of massage, back rubs, or tickles and hardly ever get any of them.
74. I love the smell when the heat comes on.
75. I love words.
76. In my spare time I would almost always rather eat, read, or sleep, preferably in that order.
77. I want to lose 60 pounds.
78. I love real estate and search for houses regularly.
79. If I am curious about something, I immediately research it on the internet until I am satisfied and then I still usually check out one or more books on the subject.
80. I don't know how I ever lived before DVR.
81. I love HGTV.
82.I started a huge quilt more than 10 years ago and it is still unfinished.
83. I would really love to start quilting again, but I need to relearn it.
84. I love to sing (alto) but I am very out of practice.
85. I am pretty good at a lot of things, but not really good at any one thing.
86. If I had unlimited funds, I would tweak my style and streamline my house, making it cleaner and more linear.
87. My grandma's nickname for me is 'Pritzy Pritz.'
88. Timm calls me 'jt'.
89.My grandma's house has always been my safe place and I have memories as early as 3 years old.
90. I swear in my dreams.
91. I am afraid of heights, including ladders.
92. My only other fear is sprouting vegetables- other than those 2 things, I'm fear-free.
93. I am trying to simplify my life, including our consumerism.
94. I used to be a huge spastic animal-rights vegetarian animal-lover.
95. Then I grew up and had kids.
96. My first child was a perfect little girl who was stillborn at full-term. Her name is Lola Jane.
97. I still cannot grasp or believe that I have 3 kids.
98. Right now I have a closet full of cute clothes that aren't even close to fitting me.
99. Right now I am also very insecure about my weight and feel like the 'fat friend.'
100. I'm so glad I'm blogging while my children are small.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Happy 27th Birthday Hannah!
I've said before that my friendship with Hannah was an unlikely one, but I couldn't have found a better friend. That said, it hasn't always been easy to have Hannah for a best friend, and I'll tell you why. It's not like it sounds- Because Hannah and I have so many differences in our personalities and M.O.'s, she seems to excel at all the things I struggle with. In times of insecurity or struggle this can be disheartening and lead me to believe that she is plain old 'better' than I am. And in many ways, she is. She has inspired me and changed me more than any other friend I can think of, and I have been blessed with many wonderful people who have influenced my life.
Hannah doesn't make excuses- she just doesn't allow herself to do it. When we talked about this I was flabbergasted. How does one not make excuses for themselves? I still remember this conversation very well, and it was almost a year ago. Something clicked as we talked and she bestowed her wisdom and maturity on me. I decided then and there that I would stop making excuses for myself, or at least try. I may fail and be lacking in many ways, but I would accept responsibility for it and not excuse myself from the blame.
Hannah is very logical and practical in her decision making, whereas I am very emotionally-driven. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but I have learned how to make less decisions based solely on emotion. I have learned that my feelings are not automatic truth and I can, and should challenge them lest they influence me unduly.
Hannah has never really struggled with depression, and I think she didn't understand it until she met me. I still don't know if she understands it, but she is at least empathetic towards my plight. Although it sounds too simplistic to be true, Hannah simply decides to be happy. In stressful, worrisome or frustrating instances, she chooses to remain calm and act positively, which is truly a struggle for me.
In short, Hannah is good at a lot of things I am comparatively bad at. There are many more ways than I have outlined, but for the sake of my self-esteem I will stop there for now. The amazing thing about her, is that even though she trumps me in many qualities, she continues to inspire and encourage me rather than depress me.
And here, true to birthday tradition, is a list of 27 things about Hannah for her 27th birthday:
1. She is a devoted mother and wife
2. She is very logical in her decision-making, leaving emotion out of it.
3. She is gritty.
4. She is hard-working, and does whatever needs to be done.
5. She is naturally positive in nature and believes she can do whatever she works hard for.
6. She is very active.
7. She is very hands-on with her girls, and engages them in activities every day.
8. She has a great relationship with her mom and sisters.
9. She has run a half-marathon-amazing!
10. She will run a marathon in the future.
11. She is an incredibly supportive friend.
12. She cries when she laughs hard.
13. She is always willing to help and fills a need where she sees it.
14. She puts most women to shame as a wife.
15. She loves cooking and baking and is great at both of them.
16. She loves nice wine.
17. She is very creative and loves scrapbooking and book making.
18. She made me a blanket for Bella's baby shower when I barely knew her.
19. I met Hannah when I took her position to work at Leaving Prints- she was leaving to have Mya, I had just had Lola.
20. She seems to have boundless energy.
21. She looks great without makeup and sparkles when she does wear it.
22. She photographs very well.
23. She has great skin with a beautiful olive complexion.
24. She struggles with decorating.
25. She loves to work in, harvest, and ear from her garden.
26. She is patient and not easily riled, taking things in stride.
27. She loves good food, especially fine cheese.
That list was easy to rattle off- she has so many admirable and endearing qualities.
My life is enriched by knowing Hannah. My family benefits because I am a better wife and mother because of her. I try harder, take more deep breaths, pause more, smile more, and live a better life because of her. She's my best friend, and I'm blessed for it.
(All pictures, save the first one, from my trip to Utah this last June. We packed in the SPs.)
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Fiona at 2 Months
Fiona is 2 months old today. We had a doctor's appointment today to try and find a way to manage her 'colic', and she weighed in at 11 pounds 1 ounce. She's gaining at more than an ounce a day, and that puts her in the 60th percentile. So different from Bella's growth that had her off the charts, finally beginning to climb back on in the 2nd percentile. Besides her problems with 'colic' (to be further discussed later-) she is perfectly well and happy. About a week ago she started rolling over from her back to tummy several times, which seems pretty early. She;s more and more alert, although fortunately she still sleeps a significant portion of the day. Because of the reflux she still eats every 2 hours, and about every 3 or 4 at night. 4 hours is kind of a stretch.
She is a snugly little girl. I love to hold her while she nestles into me, finding ultimate maternal comfort. I try to take advantage of this fleeting time of infancy and her willingness to cuddle with me while it lasts. We finally brought out the swing and despite it's hideousness, works wonders for her calming and my productivity. She still sleeps in her bouncer next to our bed, when she;s not sleeping in our bed! The inclination of the bouncer is good for her reflux, so she probably won't be sleeping in her crib for a couple few months yet... Lately with her discomfort she is only comfortable sleeping cradled in my arm in bed with me. This is not my favorite situation, but my sleep is important to me, so I sacrifice a little bit of comfort for a night's, albeit disturbed, sleep. Hopefully once we get this colic/reflux/discomfort under control we can wean her away from us. In a little while she'll be old enough to sleep through the night so we can let her cry for a night, hopefully doing the trick to getting her to sleep on her own in her crib. That worked with Bella, anyway...
She still has a sweet demeanor, and her diminishing episodes of crying are clearly from pain and not personality. She is starting to make more and more little baby noises besides cries and wails, and I can't wait until she starts to 'talk'.
I devise many inane songs devoted to 'Little Fi.' She's still referred to as 'Fi Fi Kate', 'Little Fi', or 'Fi Fiona Fi Fiona Kate' in song form. She is a great audience and seems to genuinely enjoy my drivel. For that she has my affection.
All in all, life with a baby is fun and full of cuteness. What other creature can cause you to coo over their every bodily function, utterance and facial expression? Loving life with our newest addition and our family feeling in it's completion, at least if just for now.
Pictures to follow...
She is a snugly little girl. I love to hold her while she nestles into me, finding ultimate maternal comfort. I try to take advantage of this fleeting time of infancy and her willingness to cuddle with me while it lasts. We finally brought out the swing and despite it's hideousness, works wonders for her calming and my productivity. She still sleeps in her bouncer next to our bed, when she;s not sleeping in our bed! The inclination of the bouncer is good for her reflux, so she probably won't be sleeping in her crib for a couple few months yet... Lately with her discomfort she is only comfortable sleeping cradled in my arm in bed with me. This is not my favorite situation, but my sleep is important to me, so I sacrifice a little bit of comfort for a night's, albeit disturbed, sleep. Hopefully once we get this colic/reflux/discomfort under control we can wean her away from us. In a little while she'll be old enough to sleep through the night so we can let her cry for a night, hopefully doing the trick to getting her to sleep on her own in her crib. That worked with Bella, anyway...
She still has a sweet demeanor, and her diminishing episodes of crying are clearly from pain and not personality. She is starting to make more and more little baby noises besides cries and wails, and I can't wait until she starts to 'talk'.
I devise many inane songs devoted to 'Little Fi.' She's still referred to as 'Fi Fi Kate', 'Little Fi', or 'Fi Fiona Fi Fiona Kate' in song form. She is a great audience and seems to genuinely enjoy my drivel. For that she has my affection.
All in all, life with a baby is fun and full of cuteness. What other creature can cause you to coo over their every bodily function, utterance and facial expression? Loving life with our newest addition and our family feeling in it's completion, at least if just for now.
Pictures to follow...
Portrait of Young Motherhood
Too many days, this is what I look like- no makeup, no hair done, in lounge clothes, nestled on the couch with these 2.
Yesterday I'm trying to talk to Michelle on the phone and nurse Fiona at the same time. It takes both hands to nurse Fiona to try and help regulate the flow, so I've literally got my hands full. Then Bella calls for me from the bathroom exclaiming that she needs help wiping. Augh. So I pull Fiona off, walk gingerly to the bathroom with the phone perched on my shoulder where Bella says that she's pooped and needs help wiping. Augh. So with phone perched on my shoulder, Fiona cradled in one arm, I use the other to reach down and help her wipe. While she is still pooping. Gross. As I pull my hand back in good-natured disgust, Fiona pukes all over my other arm and onto the floor. It's not pretty, but I can't help but laugh at the picture of young motherhood displayed in my bathroom.
Yesterday I'm trying to talk to Michelle on the phone and nurse Fiona at the same time. It takes both hands to nurse Fiona to try and help regulate the flow, so I've literally got my hands full. Then Bella calls for me from the bathroom exclaiming that she needs help wiping. Augh. So I pull Fiona off, walk gingerly to the bathroom with the phone perched on my shoulder where Bella says that she's pooped and needs help wiping. Augh. So with phone perched on my shoulder, Fiona cradled in one arm, I use the other to reach down and help her wipe. While she is still pooping. Gross. As I pull my hand back in good-natured disgust, Fiona pukes all over my other arm and onto the floor. It's not pretty, but I can't help but laugh at the picture of young motherhood displayed in my bathroom.
Blessing Day Photos
A little late, here are Fiona's blessing day photos from about 3 weeks ago. My parents came down for it and Timm included dad, Paul, Sam Smith (Molly's husband), Andrew Croshaw (Karilee's husband), Shane Stewart, and Mark Richardson in the circle. I'm glad that mom and dad got to come down- I always love seeing their interactions with the girls, especially Bella. Bella feels so comfortable with them and is particularly drawn to grandpa and his male attention. She seems to enjoy the different kind of play and attention that she gets from the male figures in her life: Timmy, dad, papa, Paul, Blake...
Adoration.
I was a little worried about the frailty of that head!
Proud parents, again.
(Almost) Our whole family.
3 Generations of women.
Adoration.
I was a little worried about the frailty of that head!
Proud parents, again.
(Almost) Our whole family.
3 Generations of women.In Fiona's blessing Timm blessed her that she would make good friends and associates who would help her do what is right, that she would marry a worthy man in the temple. He specified that she was a very special spirit reserved for this time on earth and that her Heavenly Father wanted her to know of His love for her. After the blessing, which was succinct but nice, Timm immediately asked me what he said. He had no recollection of any of it.
I wish I had a full picture of the dress that Fiona is wearing. My grandma Charlotte made it for me when I was blessed, and Bella wore it as well. I love having an heirloom like this that has so much significance to me. I'm so thankful that my mom had the foresight to keep it, and I'm sure my girls will too, someday.
I'm so thankful that Timm is a righteous Priesthood holder who has the power and ability to bless our daughters. I'm thankful to know that our home and our family is protected through this great blessing.
I wish I had a full picture of the dress that Fiona is wearing. My grandma Charlotte made it for me when I was blessed, and Bella wore it as well. I love having an heirloom like this that has so much significance to me. I'm so thankful that my mom had the foresight to keep it, and I'm sure my girls will too, someday.
I'm so thankful that Timm is a righteous Priesthood holder who has the power and ability to bless our daughters. I'm thankful to know that our home and our family is protected through this great blessing.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Bella Lately
Last week, for the first time ever, Bella fell asleep on the couch. I am not exaggerating when I say she has not ever fallen asleep somewhere other than her crib, bed, or car seat. She did it again last night, evidence of her exhaustion on days she does not nap. Here she is bundled up with towels and a bath mat from the laundry, along with a package of wipes for a pillow.Bella's been learning how to help more and clean up more of her own messes. I frequently ask her to clean up after her meal, which means throwing away her trash (a yogurt container, napkin etc.) and putting her dishes in the sink, or in the dishwasher if it's ready to load. If she has a small amount of food left on her plate she will scrape it into the trash. She's doing really well.
Of course sometimes she makes mistakes...
A few weeks ago we had our annual neighborhood yard sale. I was excited to go, so I packed up both of the girls for the adventure early that Saturday morning. Over all, it turned out to be a bust, but Bella sure enjoyed playing all day. She hung out on our neighbor's driveway playing with their assortment of toys for hours.
Little plastic frogs and other various small items? She was in heaven.
And the potty training report: SUCCESS! It is completely opposite of our last 2 attempts. She wasn't totally on board, but we did a paper chain and put it on the calendar, so when the say came we just went with it. Even if she wasn't excited, she showed no resistance this time, and by 2 she was taking the lead! The second day she went in and closed the door, telling me she needed privacy and then called me back a few minutes later to tell me she had pooped! I was expecting that one to be a hurdle... It's been about a week and a half, and since then she's had a few accidents, but most days pass without incident. She wears pull-ups for naps and nighttime, but wakes up dry most of the time. I love this! I cannot imagine how I bore those toddler diapers for so long... If it seemed obscene before, now it is just a sick horror I am wiping from my memory. I love potty training. She is so much cuter wearing little undies than s huge big diaper! She seems so much older overnight, in a good way. Love it, love it, love it.
And this one has nothing to do with Bella, but lately (when I do get ready...) I haven't been putting on any foundation- just a bit of concealer. I have never gone without foundation when I do my makeup- ever. I don't know if my glasses help hide enough of my face and under-eye circles that I can get away with it, or what, but I'm digging it. Of course, I still don't put on makeup everyday... Oh the weariness and laziness of new motherhood. When does that excuse become invalid?
(No foundation- spot concealer and pressed powder only. A huge accomplishment for my face.)
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Random Lists
Pet Peeves:
1. People who misuse the word 'weary', replacing it for 'wary'. As in, 'I was weary of such and such...' It's even on a national commercial right now. How does that get past so many people and make it on the air? Sickening.
2. Mouth Noises. Especially smacking. Especially smacking.
3. 'Iregardless.' Although it does make me laugh.
Names I would consider if we ever had a 4th girl:
(they go nicely with 'Lola', 'Isabella', and 'Fiona'.)
1. Georgia
2. Sophia (except it's currently the #1 girl's name.)
3. Mia (is that cool, Molly?)
4. Gloria
5. Emma
6. Stella (except it rhymes with Bella...same with 'Ella'.)
7. Mona ( inspired by a great friend)
8. Hannah (my best friend and a palindrome.)
9. Elsa
Lately I'm Eating:
1. Cheeze-Its
2. Diet Rite cola
3. The grocery store's last bag of candy corn for .30
4. Homemade granola bars
5. Starburst
6. Rita's Water Ice
(What happens when I eliminate dairy and have no recipes ready-)
Lately I'm Watching:
1. House. A lot of House.
2. The Office
3. Survivor
4. Heroes
5. Chuck
Things I Want:
1. a double jogger
2. running shoes
3. my own iPod
4. a new mattress, sheets, pillows
5. clothes that fit
6. a pedicure
7. a higher salary for Timm
8. a cure for colic
9. no more cellulite, stretch marks or flabby C-section fold. (Ew- 'flabby'.)
10. a milkshake
11. to lose 50+ pounds
12. a housekeeper
13. a guest room
14. perfect vision
15. a house void of cat soil
1. People who misuse the word 'weary', replacing it for 'wary'. As in, 'I was weary of such and such...' It's even on a national commercial right now. How does that get past so many people and make it on the air? Sickening.
2. Mouth Noises. Especially smacking. Especially smacking.
3. 'Iregardless.' Although it does make me laugh.
Names I would consider if we ever had a 4th girl:
(they go nicely with 'Lola', 'Isabella', and 'Fiona'.)
1. Georgia
2. Sophia (except it's currently the #1 girl's name.)
3. Mia (is that cool, Molly?)
4. Gloria
5. Emma
6. Stella (except it rhymes with Bella...same with 'Ella'.)
7. Mona ( inspired by a great friend)
8. Hannah (my best friend and a palindrome.)
9. Elsa
Lately I'm Eating:
1. Cheeze-Its
2. Diet Rite cola
3. The grocery store's last bag of candy corn for .30
4. Homemade granola bars
5. Starburst
6. Rita's Water Ice
(What happens when I eliminate dairy and have no recipes ready-)
Lately I'm Watching:
1. House. A lot of House.
2. The Office
3. Survivor
4. Heroes
5. Chuck
Things I Want:
1. a double jogger
2. running shoes
3. my own iPod
4. a new mattress, sheets, pillows
5. clothes that fit
6. a pedicure
7. a higher salary for Timm
8. a cure for colic
9. no more cellulite, stretch marks or flabby C-section fold. (Ew- 'flabby'.)
10. a milkshake
11. to lose 50+ pounds
12. a housekeeper
13. a guest room
14. perfect vision
15. a house void of cat soil
Updates
Well, on the Fiona/colic front, things are kind of grim. The last two nights have included 3 hours of inconsolable, continuous screaming and crying. She is in such obvious pain and discomfort and writhes and flails without relief. I try Milicon, Gripe Water, and Zantac. Holding her on my shoulder, across my lap, in the football hold, on my knee. Rocking, swaying, bouncing,walking. Inside, outside. In my arms, the swing, the bouncer. Bottle, breast. Light, dark. Quiet, white noise, tv. Burping, farting, spitting up. We've done and tried it all. To no avail.
It is frustrating, maddening, and sad. I can't fault her for it, and although it drives me to the brink of tears and insanity, I am still sorrier for her than me. I turns out, dairy is in everything. Everything worth eating anyway. I was seeing big improvements even though milk proteins stay in your body for up to 2 weeks. Then 2 days ago I had a McDonald's ice cream cone. Over the years I have had numerous unverified sources tell me that they were non-dairy. It sounds asinine, I know, but how could so many unrelated people be wrong about such a little thing? Well they are. My first tip off was her extreme reaction of screaming and crying in severe pain for 3 hours. It was sudden, abrupt, and 4-6 hours after I ate the ice cream. I did a little research online, and it turns out the cone is just plain old reduced-fat vanilla ice cream. (Sorry, dad.) The next night gave a similar reaction, if a little less severe. The last two nights she has slept cradled in my arm, in bed with us. Today she has been fairly fussy all day, needing to be held and fed often, repeating all the aforementioned techniques. I feel like I've taken a huge backslide on the productivity scale, as in the newborn sleep-deprived walking zombie stage. I'm either busy trying to console and soothe all hours of the day and night, or exhausted from doing so. This definitely has a bit of the depression starting to close in on me. I am isolated, tired, an ineffective parent and covered in milk and spit-up. Once again I know it is a phase, but one that threatens to last at least another 1-2 months if it follows the typical colic pattern, as it has thus far. I can't believe I once said that I thought colic was merely an indication of personality... not so. My sweet baby girl is transformed into a screaming, writhing creature of pain, incapable of relief while I impotently try to console her. I'm making a Dr's appointment next week, continue to dose her with 3 different supplements and medication, and imposing stricter limitations on my own diet.
Bella updates to come...
It is frustrating, maddening, and sad. I can't fault her for it, and although it drives me to the brink of tears and insanity, I am still sorrier for her than me. I turns out, dairy is in everything. Everything worth eating anyway. I was seeing big improvements even though milk proteins stay in your body for up to 2 weeks. Then 2 days ago I had a McDonald's ice cream cone. Over the years I have had numerous unverified sources tell me that they were non-dairy. It sounds asinine, I know, but how could so many unrelated people be wrong about such a little thing? Well they are. My first tip off was her extreme reaction of screaming and crying in severe pain for 3 hours. It was sudden, abrupt, and 4-6 hours after I ate the ice cream. I did a little research online, and it turns out the cone is just plain old reduced-fat vanilla ice cream. (Sorry, dad.) The next night gave a similar reaction, if a little less severe. The last two nights she has slept cradled in my arm, in bed with us. Today she has been fairly fussy all day, needing to be held and fed often, repeating all the aforementioned techniques. I feel like I've taken a huge backslide on the productivity scale, as in the newborn sleep-deprived walking zombie stage. I'm either busy trying to console and soothe all hours of the day and night, or exhausted from doing so. This definitely has a bit of the depression starting to close in on me. I am isolated, tired, an ineffective parent and covered in milk and spit-up. Once again I know it is a phase, but one that threatens to last at least another 1-2 months if it follows the typical colic pattern, as it has thus far. I can't believe I once said that I thought colic was merely an indication of personality... not so. My sweet baby girl is transformed into a screaming, writhing creature of pain, incapable of relief while I impotently try to console her. I'm making a Dr's appointment next week, continue to dose her with 3 different supplements and medication, and imposing stricter limitations on my own diet.Bella updates to come...
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